Tips on How to Gain Self Confidence
Part of learning how to gain confidence is an ability to maintain a positive attitude about yourself and your life. A key aspect to being positive is maintaining a sense of hope.I look at hope as simply a belief that there is something good to look forward to in your future. This may relate to many different things, including family, friends, life experiences, holidays and career success.But the problem is too many people look at hope as something that comes and goes, that they have no control over. They think that their hopefulness is simply a reflection of their external situation. If things are going to get better in their lives, they feel hopeful. If things are going poorly, they feel hopeless.
Do you have any hobbies or sports that you enjoy playing? Some things like going swimming, painting or writing can hold your attention and get you into a state of 'flow'. While you are in the flow you forget about everything else.Afterwards, you'll feel competent and capable. It's a great way to boost your self-esteem. If you don't have any particular hobbies or pastimes that you enjoy make an effort to try something you've always wanted to try.
Picture yourself doing it, and then give it a try! It doesn't have to be something big - it can be as simple as joining a walking club.You'll find that you are more centered and happier if you do something that puts you in that flow at least once a week.It's been shown that low self-esteem develops hand-in-hand with individuals who put too much focus on themselves. You can gain confidence by doing something that focuses on someone else or even something else.You'll find that when you are in a situation where you are meeting new people, you immediately become less nervous when you focus on the person you are meeting.
Writing your goals down on paper. People who fail will write their goals down once, look at them, put pen and paper down and then forget about it. People who have learnt how to gain self confidence proceed with their goals and never ever quit. I know this may sound harsh right now, but quitters remain quitters until they believe they can be winners. Be a winner.Be a winner. Even if you lose at one point in time be a winner. Even if somebody totally humiliates you, you are a winner. Why? Simply because everybody is a winner. Everybody is good at something. The reason you have low self confidence is because you have been programmed to believe something that isn't true... at all. Maybe people around you have told you that you are worthless or too stupid to do something. Guess what, you are not, you are a winner. You are a winner because you know that if you set your mind to do something you will obtain this goal. You have done it before, every single time. You just don't know it.
Have extreme determination and faith. Know that if you have set your mind to do something you will obtain it. Maybe not tomorrow or the next day. Maybe not in 1 week or even 1 year. Learning how to gain self confidence takes time. Some people get over these negative thoughts and gain amazing self confidence in only 10 days. For some people the programming has taken much harder and it takes them 2 months. Maybe you are so deep into it that it takes 5 years? Even if it takes 5 years, when that day comes and you know when you are there, you will feel that 5 years was worth it.
Patience. Learning how to gain self confidence is like fishing with a fishing rod, in a way. Let me explain. have you ever tried to fish with a fishing rod and you see something happen. You reel in to see if something happened. You find the fish has broke lose. You get pissed and throw it back in the water. This happens 5-10 times before you catch anything. In the mean time your friend is pulling up the fish every single time and he is laughing of joy. He is patient... he knows that when the fish bites, it takes a little bit of time before the hook is 100% attached. The point here is that, if something doesn't work for you, throw the rod back in and try again. When you want to give up the most, you know you are the closest!
If you are stuck in a rut, your life becomes boring and predictable. It kills your spontaneity and appetite for life. You don't feel alive and that makes you feel insecure. Make some changes in your life, especially dealing with your everyday life (your job, your partner, your home etc.).If you aren't happy in your current situation, you have to change it to become vibrant once again. When you do it, you'll automatically feel more confident. It's hard to feel confident if you feel unhappy.
Second, speak with confidence. Picture yourself talking with a very close friend so that you will feel comfortable with your conversations. Plan ahead and think about the topics you'd like to discuss during your first date. This gives you a sense of control knowing where to lead the conversations that would enhance the chances of a successful first date. Good examples for getting to know each other better include discussing your likes and dislikes, your work, friends, hobbies you enjoy and how you feel about what's going on in the world, etc. Keep the conversation light, but not too shallow. Don't hesitate to ask questions about your date as this will keep the conversation balanced. Just make sure it is appropriate with regards to the time and place.
Third, be on time. Arriving on time gives your date the impression that you are serious about meeting with him/her. Men, it is appropriate that you come earlier. Don't keep your date waiting. He/she may have other appointments after your date, and you don't want to waste his/her time by showing up late. If you are running a bit behind, it's a common courtesy to call your date to let them know that you will be a little bit late.
Try to learn something new everyday to broaden your mind. There's nothing better than knowledge to make you feel more confident about yourself. The great Anthony Robbins said, "Once you stop growing, you die." Sound advice.By learning how to gain confidence, over the course of time you will find that it becomes much easier for you to make any necessary changes to your life. This in turn gives you even more confidence. And the cycle repeats.
Do you have any hobbies or sports that you enjoy playing? Some things like going swimming, painting or writing can hold your attention and get you into a state of 'flow'. While you are in the flow you forget about everything else.Afterwards, you'll feel competent and capable. It's a great way to boost your self-esteem. If you don't have any particular hobbies or pastimes that you enjoy make an effort to try something you've always wanted to try.
Picture yourself doing it, and then give it a try! It doesn't have to be something big - it can be as simple as joining a walking club.You'll find that you are more centered and happier if you do something that puts you in that flow at least once a week.It's been shown that low self-esteem develops hand-in-hand with individuals who put too much focus on themselves. You can gain confidence by doing something that focuses on someone else or even something else.You'll find that when you are in a situation where you are meeting new people, you immediately become less nervous when you focus on the person you are meeting.
Writing your goals down on paper. People who fail will write their goals down once, look at them, put pen and paper down and then forget about it. People who have learnt how to gain self confidence proceed with their goals and never ever quit. I know this may sound harsh right now, but quitters remain quitters until they believe they can be winners. Be a winner.Be a winner. Even if you lose at one point in time be a winner. Even if somebody totally humiliates you, you are a winner. Why? Simply because everybody is a winner. Everybody is good at something. The reason you have low self confidence is because you have been programmed to believe something that isn't true... at all. Maybe people around you have told you that you are worthless or too stupid to do something. Guess what, you are not, you are a winner. You are a winner because you know that if you set your mind to do something you will obtain this goal. You have done it before, every single time. You just don't know it.
Have extreme determination and faith. Know that if you have set your mind to do something you will obtain it. Maybe not tomorrow or the next day. Maybe not in 1 week or even 1 year. Learning how to gain self confidence takes time. Some people get over these negative thoughts and gain amazing self confidence in only 10 days. For some people the programming has taken much harder and it takes them 2 months. Maybe you are so deep into it that it takes 5 years? Even if it takes 5 years, when that day comes and you know when you are there, you will feel that 5 years was worth it.
Patience. Learning how to gain self confidence is like fishing with a fishing rod, in a way. Let me explain. have you ever tried to fish with a fishing rod and you see something happen. You reel in to see if something happened. You find the fish has broke lose. You get pissed and throw it back in the water. This happens 5-10 times before you catch anything. In the mean time your friend is pulling up the fish every single time and he is laughing of joy. He is patient... he knows that when the fish bites, it takes a little bit of time before the hook is 100% attached. The point here is that, if something doesn't work for you, throw the rod back in and try again. When you want to give up the most, you know you are the closest!
If you are stuck in a rut, your life becomes boring and predictable. It kills your spontaneity and appetite for life. You don't feel alive and that makes you feel insecure. Make some changes in your life, especially dealing with your everyday life (your job, your partner, your home etc.).If you aren't happy in your current situation, you have to change it to become vibrant once again. When you do it, you'll automatically feel more confident. It's hard to feel confident if you feel unhappy.
Second, speak with confidence. Picture yourself talking with a very close friend so that you will feel comfortable with your conversations. Plan ahead and think about the topics you'd like to discuss during your first date. This gives you a sense of control knowing where to lead the conversations that would enhance the chances of a successful first date. Good examples for getting to know each other better include discussing your likes and dislikes, your work, friends, hobbies you enjoy and how you feel about what's going on in the world, etc. Keep the conversation light, but not too shallow. Don't hesitate to ask questions about your date as this will keep the conversation balanced. Just make sure it is appropriate with regards to the time and place.
Third, be on time. Arriving on time gives your date the impression that you are serious about meeting with him/her. Men, it is appropriate that you come earlier. Don't keep your date waiting. He/she may have other appointments after your date, and you don't want to waste his/her time by showing up late. If you are running a bit behind, it's a common courtesy to call your date to let them know that you will be a little bit late.
Try to learn something new everyday to broaden your mind. There's nothing better than knowledge to make you feel more confident about yourself. The great Anthony Robbins said, "Once you stop growing, you die." Sound advice.By learning how to gain confidence, over the course of time you will find that it becomes much easier for you to make any necessary changes to your life. This in turn gives you even more confidence. And the cycle repeats.
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