Romance Mistakes
Being romantic is wonderful, fun and
especially rewarding but unfortunately, many people make mistakes we all make
in relationships that can simply undo all of the good that has been done by
romantic efforts. For instance, every
couple has disagreements and upon occasion the argument has a definitive
outcome. The spouse that was right
during the argument has two choices when ‘winning’- he or she can not see it as
winning and simply move on or express understanding as to why there may have
been some confusion. Or, he or she can
gloat and make their spouse feel inferior and possibly humiliated. One works (the moving on one...) and one doesn't (the gloating one).
Conflict is often unavoidable when two people from two different
backgrounds with different beliefs are brought together. If you happen to be the one in a disagreement
who doesn’t come out as the ‘right’ one or you don't get your way, the worst
thing you can do is to pout. It’s simply
childish, not sexy at all and your partner will most likely have a difficult
time finding respect for you as a result.
While worry is a natural part of life, try not to let it overwhelm your
relationship. Wouldn't you rather focus
on much more positive things like romance?
If you find that you and your spouse schedule a lot during the week, sit
down and try to eliminate some commitments. Don't over-schedule any time that you don't have to, including vacations
and weekends.
Make choices that benefit both you and your spouse. Instead of turning on the television, ask
your wife or husband if they would like to play a board game or go for a
walk. If you decide to watch television
together, never guess at the plot or give away the ending of a movie! Try to support your spouse’s authority in
front of the children. If you disagree
about what was done, wait until you can talk quietly with your spouse and
discuss why and how things may have been done differently. He or she can always go back and change their
mind or you may eventually come to support his or her decisions.
Make as much as possible in your relationship about ‘us’ instead of
about ‘you’. This doesn't mean that you
or your spouse has to sacrifice his or her individuality, it simply means that
all decisions and thoughts about the relationship should be about both needs
instead of your own individual needs.
For instance, if you happen to be or sleep with someone who ‘hogs’ the
bed covers go out and find an extra, extra large blanket so that there’s plenty
for both to share. Don’t make an issue
out of it- make a joke and provide a solution.
Show your spouse that you are a loving and mature individual by doing
mature and loving things like never holding grudges or continuously bringing up
errors from the past. You can also be a
good listener, never interrupt and wait your turn. And most importantly, don’t allow a day to
pass by without telling your spouse that you love them.
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